Submitted by Gregory Alderete.
Years ago, while working for the Department of Defense, I gained an unexpected insight into human behavior at a simple potluck lunch. As a former Army officer, I was conditioned to eat last, so I would wait patiently on the side until everyone had gone through the line. One day, while observing the scene with my boss and mentor, he offered a nugget of wisdom that has stayed with me: “Watch who takes what, and how much they take, and you’ll learn a lot about the people you work with.”
It was a revelation. One man brought a whole watermelon but didn’t bother cutting it and later took it home, untouched. Another contributed a box of cookies, left it sealed, and took it back with him after the event. One individual took five of the 12 chicken wings—nearly half of what was available for the entire group. These seemingly minor actions spoke volumes. Some people appeared generous, bringing thoughtful dishes and making sure there was enough for others, while others displayed selfishness, entitlement, or a lack of consideration for their colleagues.
Such moments offer a unique lens into character. Who thinks of others? Who is self-serving? Who goes above and beyond to contribute versus doing the bare minimum? While it’s not a definitive measure of someone’s professional worth, observing behavior in casual, unstructured settings like a potluck can provide a deeper understanding of the values, priorities, and personalities of those you work with. Sometimes, the smallest actions reveal the most.
Love this. Thank you for sharing.
Excellent insight into human nature (and greed).
A potluck meal as well as a buffet is truly an eye-opener as to behavior and mindfulness. In the case of the watermelon, it might have been that somebody forgot to bring an appropriate knife; such things happen. I wouldn’t judge on that. But definitely on somebody eating half of the wings and not leaving enough for everyone. Neither would I judge somebody going for seconds after everybody else has had theirs – it’s a compliment for the cook.
A potluck meal is not like the feeding of the 5000. I have once witnessed such a phenomenon, by the way. I was at a German Protestant church, and the pastor handed out bread and grapes for communion. The plates passed through the pews, and when they were returned, everybody had taken a tiny bit, just in order to partake, but considered the needs of the others. That Sunday would have “fed” another church congregation the same size.
Which leads me to the point of food waste. Nobody checks other people’s garbage bins for how much foods they toss out on a daily, weekly, monthly basis. And Heaven forbid! But we all have to check ourselves first before judging others: Are we really as mindful as we’d like to be?
Thank you for sharing these wise words. That uncut watermelon takes the cake!