Jofry

Jofry’s mother named her son after Joffrey a made-up character she had once heard of who almost rose to become a king. The real Jofry on the other hand never rose to be much of anything . . . however. He was called to service during the war in Vietnam, but he couldn’t pass the test and that test wasn’t all that difficult.

For me, it’s not that hard to understand or explain. Do him a good service and he is your buddy for life. Cross him really bad and you are apt to lose teeth and conciseness.

I met Jofry on my second day of moving into the neighborhood. It was winter and the little kids (first graders) where creating snowmen and snow walls while the snow was coming down. I was unloading furniture and getting it into the house as quickly as I could. I was stumbling out of the van with the last heavy load, when I heard a roar that almost shook the moving truck. I looked up and around. An adult was being pelted by young-ins who would throw hard snowballs at the back head of Jofry and then duck down and disappear.

I whistled loudly and everyone turned and faced me. I bravely spoke and made a suggestion. I suggested that Jofry create a large snow wall to house the first graders and let the first graders circle around the block where I had seen similar kids playing in the snow. They all jumped at the chance. They gathered a bunch of snowballs and went into battle. They threw the snowballs at their new targets and then hustled back to our street and hid behind a big snow wall that Jofry constructed for them. Snow battles went on for a good hour. The kids on both sides of the block wore each other out and made a hero of Jofry, who just beamed. Jofry became a friend to all on the block, and especially me.

Jofry certainly wasn’t the brightest bulb in the world, but he knew basics and he knew money as well. For me, I think he was just mostly a slow learner. He could put two and two together. For example he passed a driving test to get his driver’s license. It took him damn near a year, but he passed it. I helped him a little bit, but that’s all.

Jofry has also helped me out a number of times. My favorite story was “Jofry and the Crowbar”. I had sold my old motorcycle with a down payment and one final payment. When the final payment didn’t materialize, I called . . . left a message and then finally drove over to the home of the person who bought the bike. He gave me some stupid lame excuse for not paying. The next day Jofry came with me. The bike owner came out gave me some BS again. Jofry went back to my car and returned and stood one foot away from the non-payer. Hanging down his side was a crowbar. When Jofry saw no money coming out of the pocket, Jofry raised up the crowbar and began twisting it just inches away for the face of the poor excuse of a buyer. I remarked that I had several options if the money was not coming by six that evening. I said, #1, Pay up now and we leave. #2, Don’t pay up now and Jofry will twist every piece of steel in the bike. #3, I drive home and leave Jofry here to walk home. Jofry hates walking.

About an hour and a half later Jofry was at my front door with cash in hand. He had gotten the money AND a ride on the back of the bike all around town and then back to my house. It’s funny how everything works out if every one is just simply being fair. I think Jofry may be the one who came up with that comment.