In late 2010, I met Ben Sclair for some FREE Starbucks coffee and an exploratory conversation.
We agreed to test my writing skills by having me submit a few columns. Ben agreed to publish my test columns in The Suburban Times (TST).
Our plan allowed Ben to cease publishing my work if he or our readers did not care for my penning. If I did not like writing columns, I was free to quit after the test period.
Just a little over ten years have passed since my first column in November of 2010. Ben Sclair and I created a fun and successful joint effort. Ben has published over 700 of my articles with the byline of Westside Story, several Benny’s & Joey’s Quiz projects, and a number of Susanne Bacon’s and my Double Take columns. It has been a great decade of writing, publishing, and engaging with the public. I certainly have enjoyed my relationship with my readers, including their reactions, questions, comments, and suggestions.
You may have noticed it has been some time since I last energetically published a series of Westside Story columns. This dearth of articles pains me. I have loved the concept, creation, and execution of my effort to communicate with friends, family, and community by harnessing my writing passion and channeling it through Westside Story.
Alas, I have been swamped with packing and unpacking because of a significant geographical change.
My columns included six prominent elements.
ELEMENTS:
(1) Personal opinion.
(2) Exaggeration.
(3) Imagination.
(4) Humor.
(5) Truth.
(6) Lies.
Before retirement from law enforcement, I was only allowed to use Element (5) Truth in my police reports.
Like Joe Friday on the TV show, Dragnet was known for saying, “Just the facts, ma’am. Just the facts”.
Once retired, my full freedom of speech was restored, allowing me to use all six elements.
My personal opinions, related to various subjects, often stimulated lively conversation and exchanging ideas with our community members.
I used exaggeration, which is a light form of telling a lie and actual lies themselves. I never told a lie that would hurt anyone. Mine were good lies and meant to make my stories more entertaining.
Developing an active imagination allowed me to see familiar things in ways others did not visualize. Imagination is a powerful stimulant to fun storytelling.
Aah, then there is humor. Many readers told me I got their day off to a good start, especially during these trying times, by infusing humor into my storytelling.
Yes, and on some occasions, I even used truth as a storytelling mechanism.
This brings me to my next point. Ben has worked with a publishing concept he calls an “acid test” from the very beginning. Essentially, two criteria determine if a writing submission is suitable for publication.
Criteria #1: The writer is a West Side citizen meaning he or she lives in the area of DuPont, Fircrest, Tillicum, Lakewood, Steilacoom, or University Place.
Criteria #2: Regardless of where the writer lives, the piece is about the Westside communities of DuPont, Fircrest, Tillicum, Lakewood, Steilacoom, or University Place.
A couple of examples:
(1) I submitted a column(s) related to the City of Lakewood establishing a rental inspection program. At the time, I lived in Lakewood, thereby meeting the Acid Test’s first criteria. Additionally, my article related to something happening in Lakewood, thereby meeting Acid Test number two. My columns were published.
(2) If I lived in Eatonville and submitted a breathtaking article with color photos on Eatonville’s 6th Annual Slug Race, popularly known as the Mollusk 500, Ben would not publish my article because neither of the criteria is met.
As of January 9, 2021, at 8:27a, I, like Lakewood City Councilman John Simpson, no longer live in Lakewood.
To get an idea of how far away I moved, check out my photo below, which documents the fact that Governor John Carney warmly welcomed me to the state of Delaware.
A quick study of the preceding sentence demonstrates my innate ability to use all six elements described above in a single sentence; (1) Personal opinion. (2) Exaggeration. (3) Imagination. (4) Humor. (5) Lies. (6) Truth.
Now that I am on the Right Coast instead of the Left Coast, I will have to find another venue for my writing. I could call my next column Rightside Story. Wherever life takes me, I must sadly report that Westside Story has come to an end. It has been outstanding. Thank you, readers, for a great decade. One of my readers subscribes to The New York Times. Maybe she can recommend me.
If appropriate, I could occasionally drop in on The Suburban Times as Writer Emeritus. Then there is still the possibility of the Benny’s & Joey’s Quiz. My writing pal, Susanne Bacon, a world-famous published author, and I might try a Double Take column making it a bi-coastal writing effort.
The views expressed in this article are the writer’s own.
I think a petition could be started to skip the criteria for publication and instead designate you as foreign correspondent which would be partially true as Delaware is way over there somewhere. 🙂
Mr. David Anderson,
Time flies. I have historical connection with two generations of the Anderson family, you being the second. My relationship with the Anderson family started in 1996. That is a quarter century of our having agreed and disagreed on various topics and issues.
The thing that is remarkable about the Boyle and Anderson relationship is the fact that ours was always a civil and constructive exchange of opinions and ideas. Thank you for 25 constructive years of, at times, lively communicaton.
In my not so humble opinion, the rest of the world could learn a lot from how we squared up with each other during times of agreement and disagreement.
Your concept that I become a Suburban Times foreign. correspondent is both creative and fun,
My best to you and your family.
Joseph Boyle
On this Mr Anderson and I agree 100%!
Ms. Linell Jones,
Thank you for your kind words. And, thank you for reading and commenting on many of my many columns during the past 10 years.
Joseph Boyle
I had no idea that Joe was bilingual and now a man of the world. Ben, we implore you to twist the criteria and permit this author to continue shedding his wisdom upon us common folk, or you can turn the page and he’ll be lost to us forever.
Will,
There is a lot about me you do not know. If only I had another 10 years, you could learn more as related to my wonderful life adventure.
Bilingual? Yes, I am fluent in both English and Pig Latin. I could try writing future columns in Pig Latin and most people would not know if it was about Lakewood area or not.
illway, Iyay ertainlycay preciateaay ouryay upportivesay anday ositivepay ordsway. Oursyay ashay eenbay ayay eatgrya elationshipray.
Osephjay Oylejay
Joe, you know that I committed you already to continue Double Takes with me, so, readers will still be able to read your wonderful writing. Apart from this – indeed, it would be a great loss if we didn’t get to read your Westside, i.e. now Eastside Stories anymore. Maybe Ben COULD consider having a “foreign” correspondent, after all? And who knows – it might bring further readers and an even more interesting clientele for advertisers. And one day – who knows? – The Suburban Times could be a household word nationwide … (I read this one daily already; not so with the Washington Post, the New York Times, or any other newspaper 😉 )
Ms. Susanne Bacon,
Time will tell. I look forward to creating our next Double Take feature together.
Oh my. What ever will it be?
It is indeed a joy and pleasure to work with you in our joint effort to bring interest, education, and entertainment to our readers.
Joseph Boyle
! DITTO !
Having enjoyed Joe’s Mirth & Mayhem for several years, I think it only right that we “legal” citizens should bestow the title of “honorary citizen” to Mr Boyle.
He soitainly deserves it!
What say ye, legalitiers?
Mr. Eric Chandler,
Thank you for your kind words. If there were to be a groundswell, perhaps City Council would vote to send me a round trip first class ticket on a plane, not a train, to bring me out to present me with a key to the city, any city.
I will hover by my laptop waiting to hear from the Mayor of the City of Lakewood, Mayor of Dupont, Mayor of University Place, Mayor of Steilacoom or the Mayor of Tillicum, David Anderson,
Joseph Boyle
Joe,
You will be missed.
Online, and at the camera store.
It was startling to see our piano in the lead photo above. Great memories of our photo shoot at Ft Steilacoom Park!
I know we caused a bit of a local mystery when we left the piano overnight (with permission) for a second crack at good light. It resulted in a few other families taking some cute shots in our absence.
This is why we hauled this monstrosity out there and back:
https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10162537492020207&set=a.166162400206&type=3
Mr. Ted Wolf,
Thanks for adding to Susanne Bacon’s and my Double Take feature related to the Piano in the park.
Had it not been for your photo shoot and piano left in the park, a lot of creativity and entertainment would. have been lost..
It was fun to read your note to me and thus learn more about how the piano, which seemed to simply desend form heaven, actually arrived in Ft Steilacoom Park.
Joseph Boyle
Thank you for your wonder and informative writings through the past years. I especially enjoyed your Double Take columns with my friend Susanne Bacon. Your life is quite an accomplished one and I wish you the best in your new endeavor. We, like you, are taking the same approach to disagreements and agreements, and moving out of state. I will continue the Suburban Times, minus JB, so I continue to the happenings of this area. Thank you for your readings and do consider writing from a distance.
Ms. Toni Aulerich Searles,
As you leave Washington State, you have 49 states to choose from.
Consider Delaware.
The traffic reminds me of the 1950s.
The sun shines all the time, except at night.
The cold and hot weather is not the same cold and hot of the more humid Washington State weather pattern. The other day I worked outside with a 35 degree temperature. It was no problem as 35 degrees in Delaware is dryer and therefore warmer than 35 degrees in Washington.
Keep your eye open for another Double Take. I am confident Susanne Bacon, world famous published author and Joe Boyle, only famous in Lakewood with not a single book published, will team up for another Double Take.
Joseph Boyle
We have found another very small town in Idaho, sounds very similar to your Delaware. We anticipate the dryer weather, small town atmosphere, close to military base and a big town and close to friends. This endeavor took us 5 years to make the decision and one factor for our choice was our age, although my cousin in your area would welcome us with open arms. I wish you and your family the best and look forward to reading more from.
P.S. I love to write and want to write more, who knows, one day I may ask for some hints!
I am looking forward to Joe’s vision from the east (wrong) coast. Anxiously? nah
I want some views about (and from?) the daughter – how she got to be a preacher – what she talked about last sunday – whether she writes better or much differently than her dad.
Mr. Dana Garen,
We have been friends since first grade back in 1950. Friends for 71 years is an amazing length of time. Some may ask, how do two guys remain friends for over 7 decades.
A couple of reasons come to mind.
(1) Neither of us stole the other’s money.
(2) Neither of us stole the other’s wife.
Now buried in my prose above are a couple of rock solid behavioral hints for long term friendship.
As to my daughter, her writing skills exceed mine in quality, importance, and public impact.
She started learning in school at age 2 1/2. As you know having sat in class with me for years, I did not start learning until I was around age 19.
Thanks for being my friend, but do not let your guard down in case I become enamored with your money. I am too old to steal your wife.
Joseph Boyle
I had figured something was up since your column hadn’t appeared in recent weeks and it was always the first I looked for. But this was unexpected. I completely get your reasoning.
Several of my family members have already moved out of state to the great state of Texas and a few of us will be following before the end of the year. It’s a wrench for sure to leave the state I love and have enjoyed for so many decades but things have changed sadly.
I will look forward to any publication you do submit and Ben prints. Good health, good times, good friends and blessed times ahead for you.
Watch the tide change at Rehoboth Beach will you? Enjoy.
Ms. Joan Campion,
Thanks for following my writing over the years and for your many comments.
Texas is a very intriguing spot on our planet for a number of reasons incuding freedom.
Great suggestion on you part that I should watch the tide change at Rehoboth Beach. You and I may have been on Rehoboth Beach at the same time in the past, but we would not have recognized each other.
If you spot me on the beach, coffee is on me.
Joseph Boyle
You will be missed and Delaware has a definite gain.
Ms. Shirlee Dashow,
Thanks for the positive comments.
When you have time, be sure to ask Mrs. B about my genius business plan that allows me to avoid income tax.
I patterned it off of the well established Bed & Breakfast concept. We call it the Boyle’s Bed & Brunch. It is like a Bed & Breakfast, but since we are getting on in years, we do not have to get up to serve breakfast.
When you hear about how large your Bed & Brunch discounts are, you and Mr. D. will want to travel East. I am certain of that.
Your discounts for staying at our B & B are so deep, we will have no income. The accommodation is free, along with the food, Cuban espresso, and Manhattan cocktails. Everything is free for you and Mr. D.
That is the genious of my plan. No income means no income tax,
Joseph Boyle
Hi Joe,
I want you to know how much I appreciate your writing, friendship and being the best mentor in my life. I’ve been your buddy and friend since 1996 when I worked with you in the newly incorporated City of Lakewood. Reading your columns has been frosting on the cake. You are a wonderful writer and humorist. I will miss our coffee meetings and motorcycle rides together. We will always be connected. Jimmy
Jimmy,
I will never forget my dear friend, Chief Larry Saunders, asking me, as as his Liaison Officer To The Chief of Police to get out there and make a positive connection with the City of Lakewood Code Enforcement staff. He wanted the police department and the city to work well together.
I did invite all of you out for a number of Starbucks meetings and as a result, you, Jimmy, became a lifelong friend. Much coffee has been consumed. Many Harley miles have been ridden. Many stories have been told. And, of course, many lies have been swapped.
Life with the two Js as friends has indeed been a blessing.
Joseph Boyle
So why the move to Delaware? Tired of PNW/? You’ll miss seeing Tahoma in the mornings.
Alan Hart,
There never was a time when we crossed paths in Lakewood when it did not prove to be a positive and constructive experience.
I wish t squeltched the rumor that I left Lakewood because Lakewood was not big enough fo the two of us.
No, we each had our own corner of Lakewood and our city could handle the two of us.
You will be missed. Oh wait. I am the one that left.
Joseph Boyle
Joe,
This, your last column gave me an unpleasant pang, being a creature of habit and wanting all to be right with the world and continue unchanged. Well, there are a few things I’d like to have changed, but I digress. It feels sad to have you gone.
We will indeed miss you, already do.
Hope your sojourn in Delaware becomes an equivalent saga to your previous life changing iterations. Eager to see how Delaware develops with you in it.
Rosanne,
You are so kind. Ours is a unique, fortuitous, and certainly a relationship built on chance.
How many friends and relatives do you know who upon moving into their new home, were greeted by a Boyle style ribbon WELCOME sign displayed in their picture window just across the way?
That sign may well have gotten our relationship started. We enjoyed having you two as friends and neighbors. Certainly, some Boyle style stunts did follow.
If we try, we can stay connected as friends in the future in spite of the the 2800 miles between us.
Joseph Boyle